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Coming Out of the Broomcloset
The Broomcloset is a term used by many Pagans and Witches to say that their practices and beliefs are hidden. Many stay in the broomcloset to escape prejudice and persecution. It can be a good idea for a time, but not forever. Hiding your beliefs is like hiding your true identity. And that is never a good thing.
There are some things that should be taken care of before you decide to venture out of your broomcloset though. You must know the right time to come out as well know yourself. You have to be prepared to answer questions honestly and truthfully. This can take a long time of study and reflection, years possibly. But at least by then you'll know you truly do believe and you'll know exactly what is you believe in.
You will also have to be prepared for any negativity that may be directed at you for your beliefs. It's sad, but true, that many people believe their religion is the only true way to God and eternal enlightenment. Defend your beliefs, but never attack another's. That only makes you, and the rest of the Pagan community, look bad. You'll have to learn to ignore people, who shouldn't bother too much anyway if you're firm in your beliefs. Don't be afraid to remind people of the First Amendment (if you're American). You have freedom of religion, and it means just that, freedom of religion! Use it.
Coming out of the broomcloset isn't all bad experiences, though. It's a way to meet new people who believe the same as you. You can learn and grow with each other. You also get the chance to help educate the world about what Paganism truly is. We can change the world for the better if we stand up for what we believe in with dignity and pride.
One of the hardest things I've ever had to do was tell my family that I did not believe in the Christian God or Jesus. I was raised Roman Catholic, though not very strictly. Only every once in a while did we go to church on Sunday. But I was still required to go through my First Communion and Confirmation. I always questioned the faith, but I only got scolded for questioning. I believe faith must involve at least some reason and logic, and the Catholic church did not provide that.
It was around the time I was completeing my Confirmation that I stumbled onto Wicca. I was about 14 years old, just the right age to begin questioning your belief system. I had never even heard of Wicca before and found it fascinating. I could relate to many of their beliefs and practices. It was wonderful to know that a faith I could relate to actually existed. However, as I did more and more research in the years to follow (and finally strayed away from all the fluffybunny stuff) I knew Wicca was not for me, though the Pagan religion in general was. I now call myself an Eclectic Pagan because I take my belief system from various traditions and modify them to fit my personal beliefs and needs.
My family never knew about this. They had their suspicions, but I told them I was researching Wicca for a Theology report. I don't think they believed me, but I got away with it (after having to actually write a report). It made me feel sick inside though. Family is important, and it's nice to be able to confide in someone who will not judge you and who loves you unconditionally. Hiding my beliefs physically hurt, and I shouldn't have to do it.
When I finally did tell my family about my beliefs, it was a huge mess. They called it "garbage" and believed it was just a phase I was going through. Five years later though, I'm hoping they've realized I'm a Pagan for good.
When I told them, I had realized that having to hide my beliefs wasn't right. I had a right to believe in whatever I wanted to. I could accept their faith, so they should be able to accept mine. My family also had a right to know what I believed in. Doing the right thing eventually overcame my fear and I acted on it. Even though it was a horrible mess, and sometimes still is, I felt the greatest relief of my life. I felt free because I didn't have to hide it anymore. They may not have agreed with me, but they knew, and that made it all better for me.
What we all have to realize is that our families do care about us and they think they're doing what is best for us. Most people grow up thinking witchcraft and Paganism are evil and Satan-worshipping. We have to educate them so that they understand the truth, or we will forever be incorrectly stereotyped.
Our families can try and repress our beliefs all they want. But what I realized is that they can never stop me from believing no matter what they do. They can never take away what is in your heart. Belief resides in your heart and soul. That's where you'll find the Goddess and God. We don't need anything else to believe. It's enough for me, and it should be for everyone else too.
Never hide from your family. It will eat you up inside. Being honest with your parents and your family is being honest to yourself. You have nothing to be ashamed of. You have every right to believe however you want to, no matter what anybody else says. This is your choice, your life, and your beliefs. And if you're serious about them, no one can change it but you. Your family will learn to accept it. They have to. Your beliefs make up who are, and to change your beliefs would be to change you. Anybody who loves you for who you are will never to try to change you.
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